When I Say I Am Happy

When I say I am happy I do not mean this is the point to my story,

this isn’t a permanent state.

When I say I am happy I mean for once I am stitched together and I am digging my nails, bitten and stubborn, into this ill begotten joy.

I will wrap my hands around it, sink my teeth into it, because even if the universe disagrees, goddamnit, this is mine.

It isn’t cherry picked or sunshine glazed but it is heating my cold, tired bones, and bringing me back to life, if only for a while.

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